belated wishes...

A belated but very happy anniversary to Rodney & Suzanne for 15 years!! Sorry we missed it, we thought it was the 13th... : / (shame on us..)

anyway, a wonderful milestone to pass. big hugs to you both. we miss you so very much. please come see us in korea....if you do, we'll even bake you a cake.

love you guys : )

bawston

hi all!

two weeks ago we spent about 8 days in the states for my work--in good ole' boston, massachusetts. peter joined me for a little vacation time to spend with his pops, brother phil, and took a side trip to boulder to visit his sister lizi and brand new niece (& the little olive neph). we were also greeted by rodney and suzanne and spent a lovely two days with them. we were glad to catch them on the tail end of their northeast excursion. it was really refreshing to be around so much family. i think being so far away helps you realize just how imperative it is to have family visits. so refreshing and warming.

boston was a much needed slice of america. i was hungry to see the christmas decorations, lights, and SNOW! it was as if i had walked into a christmas movie. we had a few inches of snow, and the city was decorated with all of the wonderfully cheesy decorations i love! we stayed in a small town 1 hour south of boston, which was perfect! it was nice to get away from the hustle and bustle of a big city.

we ate some great food while we were there (of course, this was a priority), i made some lovely new friends at the conference i attended, peter got some good skiing in, work was interesting, but the best part was being with family. wish we could have seen all of you!

merry christmas

approximately one year ago from this week, we arrived and moved into our apartment, brand spankin' new to korea. it's been quite the relationship with many ups and downs for sure.

at the beginning of our time here i was really quite unsure of this place, but a true fondness has grown in my heart for this country, my country : ) peter is growing more and more korean by the day and prides himself on "his country".

so, this christmas, i am so very thankful to have this past year of growing pains, the fun, the difficult, this not-so-easy process of getting to know this country of my heritage has produced so many more beautiful blessings than i had anticipated. thank you, Lord.

merry Christmas, everyone! hugs from Korea!

thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

Peter and I had a lovely time with a small gathering of friends in our home. It was nice to have the smell of turkey, stuffing, potatoes, and pumpkin pie fill our apartment. it was heavenly.

but...we missed you all. very much!

bossy and helpful

one of the complaints some americans have about koreans is their manner of "helping people". koreans tend to be a bit aggressive when offering help. a great example of their pushy helpfulness is with food. when you go to someone's home for dinner, be prepared to eat until you need to unbutton your pants and lay down for a while. the host or hostess will say (repeatedly), "eat more please!" or "you hardly ate anything, you need to eat more!" you can't just say, "i'm full", because to koreans that just translates into.. "sure! i'll have some more!"

i learned to pace my eating when with koreans because almost always they eat their meals in courses....and you must eat each course otherwise you'll be bombarded with all kinds of awkward questions like "are you dieting?", "do you not like the food? It doesn't taste good?", "do you want something different?" (and you don't want to go there, cause that opens a whole new can of worms)

i realize how this type of behavior can be interpreted as overbearing, which at times it is, but most of the time it is done with good intentions. koreans have a very common trust with one another and often help one another, stranger, friend or family. strangers frequently ask mothers if they can hold their baby or play with them. strangers offer one another food when in public places, like sharing fruit with someone they notice is sitting alone or offer candy to a child. americans don't do this...we don't touch other people's kids, we don't share food with strangers (unless you work the samples aisle), and we definitely don't take candy from strangers.

the other day i saw a blind man on the subway. he was transferring from one line to another. at the transfer station there were huge crowds of people, which makes it all the more difficult to go up and down stairs and walk down narrow ramps. i noticed how the people around him would quietly and gently take his elbow and guide him to the ramps or direct him to the subway sliding doors. there was no exchange of words, people would just jump right in and offer their help when they saw when help may be needed. it did not seem pushy and the help was all well accepted. the exchange of help and gratitude was just like watching a smooth dance. it was beautiful to see people taking care of each other well and people accepting help well.

i'm finding this balance of taking in some of the refreshing qualities I see among Koreans and fitting it into my "american" perspective. I've grown up with the idea that I need to be independent and not rely on other people to bail me out when I'm in trouble. I've learned to be cautious of strangers and be "smart" about who/what I trust, but while i've been in korea i'm seeing there are different and lovely ways of being that may be very different from the cultural ideals i've known for so long.

getting close

in the united states people are much more cautious about "intruding" the space of other people or respecting their "bubbles". well, in korea, there is no such thing as a bubble. you learn that quickly when you ride on the bus, subway, or escalator. people are constantly rubbing shoulders with you, bumping you, standing inches from your face. i think most americans would be completely shocked by this intrusion of personal space. i was at first. there were times buses or subways would be so crowded i think i could have lifted my legs off the ground and still be left standing the space was so tight. crazy.

it's interesting how korean people don't mind this closeness. for example, in america if a person is waiting for the elevator, and, when it opens it is full of people they will wait, smile, hold up their hand to say, "i pass. thanks anyway, you all can just close the doors cause i don't want you all up in my space and i don't want to be all up in your space." but in Korea....a crowded elevator opens and the Korean is thinking..."i'm just going to try to squeeze on in there....I'm sure I can find a little spot". Peter and I have been on an elevator where so many people were inside that the elevator wouldn't move. all of the poeple kept trying to push the buttons to make the elevator doors close, and the "emergency-there-are-too-many-kilos-in-this-tiny-elevator-dinging was squealing. no matter now fervently they pushed the "close door button" the elevator was not moving. eventually someone had to give up and just get off and take the stairs....it was a stand-off....and i lost.

also, even when we're packed like sardines, face to face with strangers, there is no sense of awkwardness among the people. in the u.s. if we're in a crowded space, someone will always try to cut the tension with a cheesy joke...."i hope no one ate egg salad for lunch.." or "i hope everyone put on their deodorant today..." but koreans just stand there, silent, avoiding eye contact (cause then it really becomes awkward) and wait for the bus/subway to become less crowded. i've become very used to it. in fact, when i return to the u.s. i think i may be popping some personal bubbles, standing closer to you than necessary. korea is rubbing off on me...

prodigal blogger returns

hi everyone.

it's been a long time. how are you? things in korea have been busy, fun, and full of good things. peter's dad, dash, was here for a two week visit which was really wonderful. it is always nice to have family around...it makes you realize how much you miss being only a short drive away.

we traveled to various cities in korea, had lots of good food, and many lovely conversations.

here are some quick updates about us:

-school and work are going fine. we're getting to know our co-workers better which has been great. making new friends is always nice.

-we are headed to BOSTON in december! my school is sending me there to participate in a conference. i'll post more details later.

-we miss you all very much. please shoot us an email or comment on a blog to say hello.

i will do my best to be a better blogger..thanks for still reading despite my negligence : )